A while ago I gave a talk to a major corporation in Australia's finance and insurance industry. It was supposed to be about mums, but for the most part I spoke to dads (and other relevant partners) and suggested that if they really wanted to make sure that mum had a good day on Mother's Day - and a good life - there were a few things they could do for mum's wellbeing. I'm sharing them here for husbands and partners to read and memorise.
1/ Help mum develop a sense of time affluence.
We feel at peace when we don’t feel stressed and rushed. Build a sense of time affluence
(or abundance, if you prefer) by:
- Walking, rather than driving (and not for exercise! Just to help slow the pace of life.)
- Having a YOYO night (You’re On Your Own) where the kids sort themselves out with leftovers or cheese toasties.
- Creating a system where mum doesn’t have to feel obliged to do everything for everyone, every time.
2/ Be open to mum's influence.
Stop being a bossy boots and let mum have a clearer, louder voice. Seek her counsel and invite her opinions.
3/ Ask how you can help.
This is big.
But do you know what’s bigger? Just muck in and help without asking.
It shouldn’t be up to mum to have to tell everyone how to help and when to help and hassle them for not helping already. Get stuff done without needing to be asked.
This means remembering to do stuff like empty the garbage or run the bins to the street, cleaning the kitchen, putting a load of washing on... you know! All that stuff that the cleaning fairy usually does.
4/ Drop your agenda and help her with hers.
And elevate her by treating her so well that your daughters will know how a man ought to treat them when they’re bigger (or even now), and so that your sons have no doubt how they ought to treat their partner when they are old enough.
The greatest compliment any dad could ever hear is
You always treated mum like she was the most wonderful woman in the world.
Bring that first-date mentality to every interaction.
Make mum's day — every day.
Mother's day is just around the corner and I hope every mum has the opportunity to feel appreciated and loved on that day. But to have a happy family, mums need support far beyond just one day of celebration.
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